Tribe

Growing up, I never saw my mother just kick it with anyone. Some would say she was shy, others said she was stuck up or too consumed with her children. In her own words though, she just “didn’t know them people like that”. When she would be around her few friends though, it was magical. During holidays or impromptu get-togethers, I watched as my mother and her friends let their hair down and have a good time. They ate whatever they wanted, swapped crazy work stories, and laughed at how their husbands were slowly becoming typical, old, black men. Looking back, there was so much power in seeing a group of successful and educated black women just having a ball. Despite their busy weekly schedules, they still tried to find time to check in with one another and when the going got tough I watched as my mother and her friends all rallied around each other. My mother never says that she has a ton of friends, but she does talk about her tribe.

From an early age, my mother told me that one day I’d have my tribe. A group of girls I’d do everything with. We’d eat together, study together, and most importantly, uplift each other. Our bond will last a lifetime. By her definition, your tribe is that group of girls you go hard for because they go hard for you. You each have your own personalities but perfectly balance each other out. These are the girls you tell everything, no matter how big or small because you know that no matter what, they still love you and have your back.

The funny thing about your tribe is that it forms when you least expect it. You go from stressing in your dorm about if you’ll spend your entire first year alone, to having people say “Y’all do everything together”. I was blessed to have found my tribe nearly seven months ago. We sat on a picnic blanket on the lawn in the dark and talked about our whole lives. As the fireflies began to come out and our faces faded into the dark, I realized that these were my people, this was my tribe.

There is power in friendship but our strength comes from our soul sisters. Our tribe isn’t just a community but an extension of ourselves. We laugh with our tribes. We cry with our tribe. We grow with our tribes. To have a tribe is to experience two of life’s most valuable treasures: Loyalty and Love.